Know what I learned at lunch while reading my Bible? I read Proverbs 3. But I concentrated on verses 5-8, not just 5 and 6. While verses 5 and 6 provide major stress relief for the weary soul, it is important that while you are going through trials, verses 7&8 literally nourish us. So following God isn't just to please Him, but it is to keep us healthy as well! Here is the text to verses 7&8 "7 Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil. 8 This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones."
Wow... amazing. These 4 verses brought strength to me on Thursday... I don't have a hard life... my problems are so small in comparison to those who are in other countries (and, counties in Southern California) but I've been stressed out for a permanent job worrying if I will ever have a permanent job again, and I have to admit at times I'm a little fearful of the Calvary group -- just as I was with the Oceanside group way back when. I can't even begin to explain why, just a glitch in my head.. haha And I admit, I know I shouldn't worry -- the lillies of the field and the birds of the skies are cared for, how much more am I cared for (Matthew 6). And I shouldn't fear anyone but God. But it happens. The cool thing is that when you DO trust in God and you do rely on Him to give you strength and take away the worry you feel on the fleshly level, you DO feel refreshed and get nourished.
Friday, August 31, 2007
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Time for a check-up
Technology... most of the time it is a good thing, you can check in with long lost family and friends and keep in touch with people you don't have the capacity to spend time with (ie., they live across the country) and even save money on toll calls, though nothing takes the place of hearing or seeing a human. Sometimes it can even challenge you in your walk with God. This morning, I got a text message on my cell phone from a friend, that though she lives close we don't talk in person a whole lot. Her text message (I admit, it could have been forwarded from someone else) said: So are you reading your Bible? Are you growing closer to God everyday? Have you told God how much you love Him yet or how much you appreciate what He's done in your life?
Wow. I I have been neglecting my Bible reading this week. It's just what God needed to have me see in the middle of my week to remind me He wants ME to spend time with Him. Instead of turning the radio on at lunch in my car and listening to the annoying Vic the Brick (AM 570) rant about how the Lakers are going to be ranked higher than 7th in the Western Conference this year (in reality, if they rank higher than 8th, I'd be surprised), I'm going to read my Bible.
So, how are YOU doing in your daily Bible reading and prayer?
Wow. I I have been neglecting my Bible reading this week. It's just what God needed to have me see in the middle of my week to remind me He wants ME to spend time with Him. Instead of turning the radio on at lunch in my car and listening to the annoying Vic the Brick (AM 570) rant about how the Lakers are going to be ranked higher than 7th in the Western Conference this year (in reality, if they rank higher than 8th, I'd be surprised), I'm going to read my Bible.
So, how are YOU doing in your daily Bible reading and prayer?
Monday, August 27, 2007
What's in a name?
A lot of my posts lately have been long, so here's a short one. :)
On Saturday, I had "dinner" (we shared Nachos and couldn't finish it) with a new friend at Applebee's and then we went over to Starbucks. We talked about a lot of things during that 5 hour time frame... Christ, society, family, medical issues, personal feelings, fashion, emergent/”feel good” churches, expositional teaching, marriage, parents, jobs and Christianity (I copied that from her blog). I said some silly things, but anyone who has known me for 5 minutes knows I can be a ditz sometimes. Like, for example... I was talking about the crazy surveys my friends on myspace do and how I'm going to lose a ton of sleep when I get a real job and I'm not a temp anymore because I'll actually be working and won't have time to do the surveys during the day. ha ha
Of all the things we talked about, I left with a deep thought about names and how we're named and how it's never an accident about our name. Just like people in Biblical times were named for a reason, it's still true today. My name is Christina (duh). My name means Christian ==> follower of Christ. Ok, so great... that isn't too much of a deep thought. But, what I never ever thought about before is that I am the only person in my immediate family that is a devoted follower of Christ. I know it sounds silly on the surface, because it did to me, too. But just think about it. I could have been named Erica (or however you choose to spell it). Why did they pick Christina over Erica? I can say on a fleshly level, Christina was one of my dad's aunt's name... Christine. I don't know if I was named after her on a fleshly level, but it seems like it. But, just like how Jacob and Abraham were named, for example, I don't think it was an accident I was named Christina after thinking about it.
What does your name mean? Are you living up to your name? Thinking about this actually challenged me to be a better Christian and increase my time with God.. so I've been listening to only KWVE and The Fish the past few days in my car... what an amazing difference it has made. I have been so calm since Saturday!!!
********
A friend referenced this verse in an email - I just have to close with it... 2 Peter 1:3 (NIV) His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.
On Saturday, I had "dinner" (we shared Nachos and couldn't finish it) with a new friend at Applebee's and then we went over to Starbucks. We talked about a lot of things during that 5 hour time frame... Christ, society, family, medical issues, personal feelings, fashion, emergent/”feel good” churches, expositional teaching, marriage, parents, jobs and Christianity (I copied that from her blog). I said some silly things, but anyone who has known me for 5 minutes knows I can be a ditz sometimes. Like, for example... I was talking about the crazy surveys my friends on myspace do and how I'm going to lose a ton of sleep when I get a real job and I'm not a temp anymore because I'll actually be working and won't have time to do the surveys during the day. ha ha
Of all the things we talked about, I left with a deep thought about names and how we're named and how it's never an accident about our name. Just like people in Biblical times were named for a reason, it's still true today. My name is Christina (duh). My name means Christian ==> follower of Christ. Ok, so great... that isn't too much of a deep thought. But, what I never ever thought about before is that I am the only person in my immediate family that is a devoted follower of Christ. I know it sounds silly on the surface, because it did to me, too. But just think about it. I could have been named Erica (or however you choose to spell it). Why did they pick Christina over Erica? I can say on a fleshly level, Christina was one of my dad's aunt's name... Christine. I don't know if I was named after her on a fleshly level, but it seems like it. But, just like how Jacob and Abraham were named, for example, I don't think it was an accident I was named Christina after thinking about it.
What does your name mean? Are you living up to your name? Thinking about this actually challenged me to be a better Christian and increase my time with God.. so I've been listening to only KWVE and The Fish the past few days in my car... what an amazing difference it has made. I have been so calm since Saturday!!!
********
A friend referenced this verse in an email - I just have to close with it... 2 Peter 1:3 (NIV) His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.
Sunday, August 26, 2007
It was not in vain!
This summer did not pass in vain. I have a few more days of this challenge set forth, but I consider this a perfect time to highlight everything that has happened. The original challenge I set up for me this summer on June 5 was to:
1) Memorize 4 verses. Which I failed. I only memorized Psalm 43:3 -- seems to be the appropriate mantra for my life this summer.
2) Do some sort of working out 5 times a week. I successfully met the challenge of working out 5 times a week, even though most weeks it is only four times. I consider this a success. I walk twice a week at the beach, I go to the gym and do the elliptical once and then do cardio and Yoga once. The only thing left to do is add more resistance training to my workouts. Whether I have to add a day of Pilates or use dumbbells at home while I have my hair wrapped in a towel drying each morning.
3) Meet people. This I thought would be the hardest challenge to meet and pursue. But, it probably was the easiest. I thought it was going to be a major leap of faith because I have always considered myself shy. I have met people I know who I will want to keep as friends and others I have stopped talking to because of their lack of ambitious faith. I’ve tried a few groups at other churches for the fellowship part, but both definitely did not work out as well as I was hoping. One I went to three times, the other was a struggle just to stay there for one evening. But by a divine appointment, I heard about this young adult group at Calvary Costa Mesa from two people and decided it wasn’t going to hurt to try it once or twice and then leave. But God didn’t have that in mind. He had in mind that I learn that shyness is a learned trait rather than a natural trait – that you can be introverted your entire life but not be shy… that the two are not synonyms or always work together. Until 3 weeks ago, I did not see the truth to Psalm 68:6 (NKJV) “God sets the solitary in families; He brings out those who are bound into prosperity; But the rebellious dwell in a dry land.” But because of the short time I have had with these people from Calvary, I know I have a family there. Families have warts and I certainly have mine (but for another post!), but it brought the ache I have to be in a family to the front and center. So it is no wonder the bulk of my conversations with people from Calvary AND Compass were centered on this in the past 2 weeks.
All through this, I've also been thinking about the phrase “anything, anyplace, at any time.” There have been numerous times I've heard Pastor Mike say that, probably once a year. The most recent time was on June 10, Ambitious Faith - Part 6. That in the Christian walk, we are to tell "God, 'Any thing... I'll do whatever you want me to do God or any place... I have no geographical preferences or at any time...it's on your schedule, God. You are signing a blank check across the table to God." I have the complete desire to do all three of those things. My problem is there is no avenue to do something bigger (yet) like packing my bags and going on a missions trip to another country or moving to another state. But, I have small examples from the last year… it was shown with my health stuff, even at the risk of going into debt for a while. It was also shown when I quit my job of 5 1/2 years and to go into "temp" work while looking for a permanent job (which I'm still praying for!). And it was also shown when I decided to join Christa on her summer challenge even though we are not in the same circles.
Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that putting Christa’s challenge and this phrase together would lead me to leave Compass. CBC has been my family for 2 ½ years not to mention the time I was at PCC since 1999. CBC will always be my family. I just have to move to another city (in more than one way!) to keep my walk with Christ strengthened and sharpened (Hebrews 4:12 and Proverbs 27:16-18). I am keeping my CBC sticker on my car. I have a standing date with my walking partners twice a week unless something comes up. I will keep the business cards to CBC in my purse to give to people in Orange County. I am remaining on the mailing lists. I am even offering to be “on call” if I am ever needed to help with the bulletins. And I of course also still have email and this wonderful blog.
A few things come to mind that some might be wondering.
Why is this time different than last time 2 years ago. This time is different because I am leaving under God’s leading, not because I’m disgruntled. This time is different because I actually have a place to go, as opposed to last time where I just left and did the searching after. This time is different because I’m much more confident about this prompting. Even if the young adult group doesn’t work out after this initial honeymoon phase, there are plenty of other ministries at Calvary to become involved in – and who knows, maybe it will lead to moving to another state or short term missions trip.
What about my statement on August 16? I did say it wasn’t MY plan to leave CBC…right? *grin*
What about the bulletins? There is/are a new bus driver(s) *BIG GRIN* (for the full effect of that title, read my post on June 10) who started driving this weekend. My hope is that if you are reading this and you attend CBC, that you will show her/them love and go in the church office once or twice a month about 3 pm and help her/them… or find out when the bulletins are being stuffed and serve her/them so she/they will not become burdened in serving, because it is a HUGE job and cannot be done with only one or two people all the time. Believe me, I know that first hand.
1) Memorize 4 verses. Which I failed. I only memorized Psalm 43:3 -- seems to be the appropriate mantra for my life this summer.
2) Do some sort of working out 5 times a week. I successfully met the challenge of working out 5 times a week, even though most weeks it is only four times. I consider this a success. I walk twice a week at the beach, I go to the gym and do the elliptical once and then do cardio and Yoga once. The only thing left to do is add more resistance training to my workouts. Whether I have to add a day of Pilates or use dumbbells at home while I have my hair wrapped in a towel drying each morning.
3) Meet people. This I thought would be the hardest challenge to meet and pursue. But, it probably was the easiest. I thought it was going to be a major leap of faith because I have always considered myself shy. I have met people I know who I will want to keep as friends and others I have stopped talking to because of their lack of ambitious faith. I’ve tried a few groups at other churches for the fellowship part, but both definitely did not work out as well as I was hoping. One I went to three times, the other was a struggle just to stay there for one evening. But by a divine appointment, I heard about this young adult group at Calvary Costa Mesa from two people and decided it wasn’t going to hurt to try it once or twice and then leave. But God didn’t have that in mind. He had in mind that I learn that shyness is a learned trait rather than a natural trait – that you can be introverted your entire life but not be shy… that the two are not synonyms or always work together. Until 3 weeks ago, I did not see the truth to Psalm 68:6 (NKJV) “God sets the solitary in families; He brings out those who are bound into prosperity; But the rebellious dwell in a dry land.” But because of the short time I have had with these people from Calvary, I know I have a family there. Families have warts and I certainly have mine (but for another post!), but it brought the ache I have to be in a family to the front and center. So it is no wonder the bulk of my conversations with people from Calvary AND Compass were centered on this in the past 2 weeks.
All through this, I've also been thinking about the phrase “anything, anyplace, at any time.” There have been numerous times I've heard Pastor Mike say that, probably once a year. The most recent time was on June 10, Ambitious Faith - Part 6. That in the Christian walk, we are to tell "God, 'Any thing... I'll do whatever you want me to do God or any place... I have no geographical preferences or at any time...it's on your schedule, God. You are signing a blank check across the table to God." I have the complete desire to do all three of those things. My problem is there is no avenue to do something bigger (yet) like packing my bags and going on a missions trip to another country or moving to another state. But, I have small examples from the last year… it was shown with my health stuff, even at the risk of going into debt for a while. It was also shown when I quit my job of 5 1/2 years and to go into "temp" work while looking for a permanent job (which I'm still praying for!). And it was also shown when I decided to join Christa on her summer challenge even though we are not in the same circles.
Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that putting Christa’s challenge and this phrase together would lead me to leave Compass. CBC has been my family for 2 ½ years not to mention the time I was at PCC since 1999. CBC will always be my family. I just have to move to another city (in more than one way!) to keep my walk with Christ strengthened and sharpened (Hebrews 4:12 and Proverbs 27:16-18). I am keeping my CBC sticker on my car. I have a standing date with my walking partners twice a week unless something comes up. I will keep the business cards to CBC in my purse to give to people in Orange County. I am remaining on the mailing lists. I am even offering to be “on call” if I am ever needed to help with the bulletins. And I of course also still have email and this wonderful blog.
A few things come to mind that some might be wondering.
Why is this time different than last time 2 years ago. This time is different because I am leaving under God’s leading, not because I’m disgruntled. This time is different because I actually have a place to go, as opposed to last time where I just left and did the searching after. This time is different because I’m much more confident about this prompting. Even if the young adult group doesn’t work out after this initial honeymoon phase, there are plenty of other ministries at Calvary to become involved in – and who knows, maybe it will lead to moving to another state or short term missions trip.
What about my statement on August 16? I did say it wasn’t MY plan to leave CBC…right? *grin*
What about the bulletins? There is/are a new bus driver(s) *BIG GRIN* (for the full effect of that title, read my post on June 10) who started driving this weekend. My hope is that if you are reading this and you attend CBC, that you will show her/them love and go in the church office once or twice a month about 3 pm and help her/them… or find out when the bulletins are being stuffed and serve her/them so she/they will not become burdened in serving, because it is a HUGE job and cannot be done with only one or two people all the time. Believe me, I know that first hand.
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Wow.
I have to brag again about the CCCM group. Last night's message was about praying for one another... James 5:14-16. The second week in a row, the pastor said for anyone who needed prayer for something they are facing to stand up and the people around them would pray for them. Very powerful. The application of the verses was amazing.
Then we went out to Denny's. There were at least 30 people there, I don't know if that was half or not, but there were a TON of people. At midnight, I decided it was time for me to leave or I'd fall asleep driving... I commented how I had to stop at the Shell station across the street but the three people I said that to immediately went into their purse/wallet to hand me $5 so I didn't have to make the extra stop and save 5 min for that and the 10 min I saved by just by NOT going on the freeway. I guess I looked more tired than I felt. But still, that was an amazing gift... I know it's only $5 and 15 minutes but that instance alone is a perfect example of how wonderful everyone is. I'm sure it was a gift and does not need to be repaid, but I'm going to offer to pay it back once. If the answer is no, then fine, but all I can do is offer. There will be plenty of time for paybacks. :)
Then we went out to Denny's. There were at least 30 people there, I don't know if that was half or not, but there were a TON of people. At midnight, I decided it was time for me to leave or I'd fall asleep driving... I commented how I had to stop at the Shell station across the street but the three people I said that to immediately went into their purse/wallet to hand me $5 so I didn't have to make the extra stop and save 5 min for that and the 10 min I saved by just by NOT going on the freeway. I guess I looked more tired than I felt. But still, that was an amazing gift... I know it's only $5 and 15 minutes but that instance alone is a perfect example of how wonderful everyone is. I'm sure it was a gift and does not need to be repaid, but I'm going to offer to pay it back once. If the answer is no, then fine, but all I can do is offer. There will be plenty of time for paybacks. :)
Friday, August 24, 2007
Just to settle the confusion *grin*
I have thought long and hard about my challenge...
I'm not sure I can do it in one night... I'm comfortable with the gals in the group, but not comfortable enough to just go up and ask for their phone number without having talked to them or them asking me first. (And to set the record straight, I'd be getting women's numbers because that's where my real walk with Christ challenges will be coming from.) I think I'd rather have two people poke fun at me (good naturedly of course!) than to go THAT far to stretch me within two weeks of meeting people. I'm determined to meet that challenge, but I'll take 4 weeks to get three numbers... that sits better with me. :)
I'm not sure I can do it in one night... I'm comfortable with the gals in the group, but not comfortable enough to just go up and ask for their phone number without having talked to them or them asking me first. (And to set the record straight, I'd be getting women's numbers because that's where my real walk with Christ challenges will be coming from.) I think I'd rather have two people poke fun at me (good naturedly of course!) than to go THAT far to stretch me within two weeks of meeting people. I'm determined to meet that challenge, but I'll take 4 weeks to get three numbers... that sits better with me. :)
Monday, August 20, 2007
Judgement/personal learning curve
Romans 1:28-Romans 2:1 (NIV)
28Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought not to be done. 29They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, 30slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; 31they are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless. 32Although they know God's righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them. Romans 2:1 You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.
I've heard many sermons on this... mostly only on Romans 2:1 but in context it's much more powerful seeing the few verses before it. Two thoughts occur to me because last night's message I heard on this was much more powerful than ever before... 1) I was probably ready to hear a convicting sermon on judging. 2) It is like Hebrews 4:12 says and the word of God IS living and you never tire of hearing the same thing again and again. :) Amazing, huh?
Look at that list of sins. I'm thinking of all these people who are unsaved who live in these sins daily... even hourly. Romans 2:1 hit me when I read that along with the sermon. That's ME. I have a friend who I have been judging... I haven't really been talking to him because of some stuff he has done. But just twist it a little tiny bit and I'm just as guilty of sin as he is. Ok, so he lied to me (a few times) and he made me look like a liar when I was only using his words to encourage him. But what about me? I have been full of envy lately. Envy because people have close friends and I don't... or, I guess I should say yet, which is a whole different post when I feel led to talk about it. Envy because of those who are married. I have to admit that loneliness/self-pity is pretty bad too... And what about some anger I've been feeling in recent months? That's just as bad as anything listed above. I will be judged just as bad as the drunkard. I will be judged just as bad as the ruthless girls who broke into my email account a "few" years back (which... I have entirely no idea if I would be able to say anything to them if I ever saw them again beyond hello - those scars remain though they have faded with time).
The amazing thing about God is that His grace is renewed every single day (Lamentations 3:22-23). If you just repent, it only takes a second for God's forgiveness to occur and for His love to shine through once again. And that's precisely what I did... in the quietness of my heart, I turned away from the bitter feelings I've been having. And even though I'm operating on 3 hours of sleep today, I'm not quite so lonely. Not just because I know God is with me, loves me and is protecting me... because I'm making moves to not be so lonely. I'm finding my loneliness is stemmed from my starvation of fellowship... with sisters AND brothers in Christ. I could have easily not gone out to Denny's/In-N-Out (no, I didn't have anything but iced tea and then water later)... but I did. And I left with a huge challenge waiting for me on Friday... I was challenged to go up to three people and get their phone numbers. "Hi, I don't know your name, but can I have your number?" But I guess I have to do it and I am sure the challengers will want proof. :)
28Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought not to be done. 29They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, 30slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; 31they are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless. 32Although they know God's righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them. Romans 2:1 You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.
I've heard many sermons on this... mostly only on Romans 2:1 but in context it's much more powerful seeing the few verses before it. Two thoughts occur to me because last night's message I heard on this was much more powerful than ever before... 1) I was probably ready to hear a convicting sermon on judging. 2) It is like Hebrews 4:12 says and the word of God IS living and you never tire of hearing the same thing again and again. :) Amazing, huh?
Look at that list of sins. I'm thinking of all these people who are unsaved who live in these sins daily... even hourly. Romans 2:1 hit me when I read that along with the sermon. That's ME. I have a friend who I have been judging... I haven't really been talking to him because of some stuff he has done. But just twist it a little tiny bit and I'm just as guilty of sin as he is. Ok, so he lied to me (a few times) and he made me look like a liar when I was only using his words to encourage him. But what about me? I have been full of envy lately. Envy because people have close friends and I don't... or, I guess I should say yet, which is a whole different post when I feel led to talk about it. Envy because of those who are married. I have to admit that loneliness/self-pity is pretty bad too... And what about some anger I've been feeling in recent months? That's just as bad as anything listed above. I will be judged just as bad as the drunkard. I will be judged just as bad as the ruthless girls who broke into my email account a "few" years back (which... I have entirely no idea if I would be able to say anything to them if I ever saw them again beyond hello - those scars remain though they have faded with time).
The amazing thing about God is that His grace is renewed every single day (Lamentations 3:22-23). If you just repent, it only takes a second for God's forgiveness to occur and for His love to shine through once again. And that's precisely what I did... in the quietness of my heart, I turned away from the bitter feelings I've been having. And even though I'm operating on 3 hours of sleep today, I'm not quite so lonely. Not just because I know God is with me, loves me and is protecting me... because I'm making moves to not be so lonely. I'm finding my loneliness is stemmed from my starvation of fellowship... with sisters AND brothers in Christ. I could have easily not gone out to Denny's/In-N-Out (no, I didn't have anything but iced tea and then water later)... but I did. And I left with a huge challenge waiting for me on Friday... I was challenged to go up to three people and get their phone numbers. "Hi, I don't know your name, but can I have your number?" But I guess I have to do it and I am sure the challengers will want proof. :)
Thursday, August 16, 2007
I'm ok, you're ok... really?
One of the bands/artists I highlight on myspace is the Joel Engle Band... he has a blog about a leadership conference he went to and how onlyone speaker at this conference advocated God's power. I recommend you read it even if you're totally against myspace -- you don't have to join to read his blog. It's sad to hear about that, but it's nothing that shocks me... nothing I haven't heard about before from Pastor Mike at church over the last 8 or 9 years I've known him.
But, on a personal level I had to share an experience I had last night....
I went to coffee with some guy I met online - a Christian website, but won't say the name. He looks pretty scary (a friend said he looks like a vampire and wanted me to bring garlic -- ha ha!!!) in his picture, but after meeting him in person, he just does not take pictures well. After about 20 minutes into our conversation, I knew he wasn't a Christian. Ok, ok... I take it back. He's in the "I'm ok, you're ok, let's just get along." thought process, but that still isn't a Christian. I have to admit it, though he is up to date with a ton of political speak, it was a tough hour. I was physically there, my heart was 3 miles away at Calvary Costa Mesa (CCCM), and believe me... I tried to leave at 730. Even though I would have missed worship, I'd at least have had the chance to hear the gospel being preached. Oh, oops... I just said the name of the church where the young adult group is that I'm easing my way into. And I mean that literally. I'm already quite comfortable with the people I've met, but I want to make sure this is where God wants me to be rather than where I want me to be because of my "need" to have (male and female) friends with my age.
Now that I revealed CCCM... I have to say that this is a perfect example of how Romans 8:28 works without getting too much into the language of Christianese. For those who dont know, I grew up Catholic. CCCM was the church I dispised growing up [ie., the first experience I had with someone speaking the truth about Catholicism was Chuck Smith]. But, I wasn't saved and I didn't want to hear the truth about Catholicism. It's truly a blessing this same church and pastor (indirectly, I'll add for the pastor part) has now become a source of inspiration in my adult life.
I guess my big question for the day is why do all these people who belong to the "I'm ok, you're ok" thought process call themselves Christians?
A note to those who may be "concerned"... I have no intention of leaving Compass. At least, that's not MY plan. Even though I was with people I felt comfortable with on Sunday evening, there was something missing... and the missing ingredient was Pastor Mike.
But, on a personal level I had to share an experience I had last night....
I went to coffee with some guy I met online - a Christian website, but won't say the name. He looks pretty scary (a friend said he looks like a vampire and wanted me to bring garlic -- ha ha!!!) in his picture, but after meeting him in person, he just does not take pictures well. After about 20 minutes into our conversation, I knew he wasn't a Christian. Ok, ok... I take it back. He's in the "I'm ok, you're ok, let's just get along." thought process, but that still isn't a Christian. I have to admit it, though he is up to date with a ton of political speak, it was a tough hour. I was physically there, my heart was 3 miles away at Calvary Costa Mesa (CCCM), and believe me... I tried to leave at 730. Even though I would have missed worship, I'd at least have had the chance to hear the gospel being preached. Oh, oops... I just said the name of the church where the young adult group is that I'm easing my way into. And I mean that literally. I'm already quite comfortable with the people I've met, but I want to make sure this is where God wants me to be rather than where I want me to be because of my "need" to have (male and female) friends with my age.
Now that I revealed CCCM... I have to say that this is a perfect example of how Romans 8:28 works without getting too much into the language of Christianese. For those who dont know, I grew up Catholic. CCCM was the church I dispised growing up [ie., the first experience I had with someone speaking the truth about Catholicism was Chuck Smith]. But, I wasn't saved and I didn't want to hear the truth about Catholicism. It's truly a blessing this same church and pastor (indirectly, I'll add for the pastor part) has now become a source of inspiration in my adult life.
I guess my big question for the day is why do all these people who belong to the "I'm ok, you're ok" thought process call themselves Christians?
A note to those who may be "concerned"... I have no intention of leaving Compass. At least, that's not MY plan. Even though I was with people I felt comfortable with on Sunday evening, there was something missing... and the missing ingredient was Pastor Mike.
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Koinonia
My initial reaction of this group on Friday and it is very favorable. I still don't feel comfortable releaseing the name of the church, but like I said, it is a Bible believing and preaching church -- it's one of those instances where you know exactly what to expect from the senior pastor, such as it is with Compass.
I am exhausted and wish I had the energy to talk about it more, but I will say, I was blown away with how easy it was for me to talk to total strangers. :) Who would have thought... ME??!! Talking to people I don't know with such ease? WoW. Aside from the fact that everyone (which I have to admit I don't remember most people's names) included me immediately and didn't even blink an eye or change their demeanor when they heard I go to a different church. What an amazing group of Christians... the word that immediately comes to mind is koinonia. Not only do they have the group and fellowship for about 20 minutes before worship starts, they go out to a restaurant or coffee shop after the service.
Koinonia is the anglicisation of a Greek word (κοινωνία) that means partnership or fellowship. The word is used frequently in the New Testament of the Bible to describe the relationship within the early Christian church. As a result the word is used frequently within Christian circles to describe the fellowship and community of Christians - or more frequently the idealised state of fellowship and community that should exist.
(taken from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Koinonia )
I am also learning that my "shyness" is a learned trait. I commented to someone at work the other day that my mother and I are completely opposite, that she doesn't have a problem talking to anyone without knowing anything about them and I'm not like that at all. The lady commented that I probably LEARNED to be shy because people were always doing the talking for me. Interesting. And based on the other night I definitely have to agree with her on that.
I am exhausted and wish I had the energy to talk about it more, but I will say, I was blown away with how easy it was for me to talk to total strangers. :) Who would have thought... ME??!! Talking to people I don't know with such ease? WoW. Aside from the fact that everyone (which I have to admit I don't remember most people's names) included me immediately and didn't even blink an eye or change their demeanor when they heard I go to a different church. What an amazing group of Christians... the word that immediately comes to mind is koinonia. Not only do they have the group and fellowship for about 20 minutes before worship starts, they go out to a restaurant or coffee shop after the service.
Koinonia is the anglicisation of a Greek word (κοινωνία) that means partnership or fellowship. The word is used frequently in the New Testament of the Bible to describe the relationship within the early Christian church. As a result the word is used frequently within Christian circles to describe the fellowship and community of Christians - or more frequently the idealised state of fellowship and community that should exist.
(taken from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Koinonia )
I am also learning that my "shyness" is a learned trait. I commented to someone at work the other day that my mother and I are completely opposite, that she doesn't have a problem talking to anyone without knowing anything about them and I'm not like that at all. The lady commented that I probably LEARNED to be shy because people were always doing the talking for me. Interesting. And based on the other night I definitely have to agree with her on that.
Friday, August 10, 2007
The tongue!
I'm going to another group tonight at an unnamed church... I figure, if I like it enough, I'll probably name drop in my next blog AND I will continue going to supplement anything Compass will have in the fall because afterall it IS on a Friday. :) Tuesdays are still up in the air, so I have no idea if I wil be able to be a part of women's bible study. This church tonight is a Bible believing and preaching church. As we were hanging up last night, the person who invited me said, "Oh, you will want to bring your Bible, we use it. We're not one of those feel good churches." I laughed and said, "Isn't that what we own Bibles for, to use them?" (Pastor Mike is finally rubbing off on me after 8 years of being under his teaching... I'm a little slow in catching on sometimes! haha) I might also add that though it's not specifically a singles group, it's a young adult group (25-35).
(A note about Tuesdays: I could very well "sneak in" to the "Newport Beach" meetings aside from the 2nd Tuesdays, but for me to do that, they would have to have a calendar of who will be speaking. Though I got a lot out of the psychologist (who is a Christian by the way - I discovered that when I met with him individually... both in November and April before I quit my job) who led most of the meetings, he's repeating stuff.)
This group is going through the book of James, I do believe they are in Chapter 3. So I had to pull James 3 up ths morning. Verse 6 struck me... "6The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell." This verse also reminds me of Matthew 15:17-18 because the tongue only reflects what is in the heart. In Matthew 15, the Pharisees are questioning Jesus about why his disciples do not wash their hands before eating and about how they're breaking the laws. His response was, "17"Don't you see that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body? 18But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man 'unclean.'"
If we could learn to take captive all of our thoughts and only think of things that are a blessing to God... I think we (as Christians) might start getting along better with each other and with nonChristians.
Just my thoughts.
(A note about Tuesdays: I could very well "sneak in" to the "Newport Beach" meetings aside from the 2nd Tuesdays, but for me to do that, they would have to have a calendar of who will be speaking. Though I got a lot out of the psychologist (who is a Christian by the way - I discovered that when I met with him individually... both in November and April before I quit my job) who led most of the meetings, he's repeating stuff.)
This group is going through the book of James, I do believe they are in Chapter 3. So I had to pull James 3 up ths morning. Verse 6 struck me... "6The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell." This verse also reminds me of Matthew 15:17-18 because the tongue only reflects what is in the heart. In Matthew 15, the Pharisees are questioning Jesus about why his disciples do not wash their hands before eating and about how they're breaking the laws. His response was, "17"Don't you see that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body? 18But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man 'unclean.'"
If we could learn to take captive all of our thoughts and only think of things that are a blessing to God... I think we (as Christians) might start getting along better with each other and with nonChristians.
Just my thoughts.
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
Genesis 4:6-7
In light of my previous post... perhaps I'm condemning myself but this was on my heart today.
Genesis 4:6&7
"6 Then the LORD said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? 7 If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it."
I have not been following through with what I've promised myself and talk to people who "annoy" me. I didn't name drop or condemn anyone, just sharing what's on my mind, but I should still go to those who I am/was angry with (because it's more a mild irritation now, nothing keeping me from talking to them) and MAYBE those who intimidate me. Probably won't ever do that, but it's a thought. Because it is preventing me from going to church -- my church, that I supposedly call my home church -- and isn't living in "fear" a sin? Isn't running away from the intimidation factor letting it master me?
Thoughts/comments?
Genesis 4:6&7
"6 Then the LORD said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? 7 If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it."
I have not been following through with what I've promised myself and talk to people who "annoy" me. I didn't name drop or condemn anyone, just sharing what's on my mind, but I should still go to those who I am/was angry with (because it's more a mild irritation now, nothing keeping me from talking to them) and MAYBE those who intimidate me. Probably won't ever do that, but it's a thought. Because it is preventing me from going to church -- my church, that I supposedly call my home church -- and isn't living in "fear" a sin? Isn't running away from the intimidation factor letting it master me?
Thoughts/comments?
Thursday, August 2, 2007
Fruits of the Spirit
I'm not going to lie -- I haven't been going to church. If I don't go this week, it will be three weeks and to be quite honest, I'll probably force myself to not go - just to see. *cynical grin*
I could have gone to a church close to home, but where am I gonna go... Saddleback? I may as well just not go if that's the case -- it's not like Christ dying on the cross was even mentioned at the Good Friday service I went to. So, I haven't gone to church... I've been ticked at two people, intimidated by quite a few and feel entirely handicapped by everyone else... though admittedly indirectly.
During this LOA or AWOL or whatever you want to call it that I've been a part of, I decided I would try a small group at another unnamed church... to which I went to last night. I wanted to scream! I walked in to hearing how the guy whose house it is at went out on Sat and drank heavily!!!! Then, when the leader came, the guy used a not so Christian term of endearment to the leader. It was definitely not meant as a put down, but not the type of language you should be hearing or using at a Christian small group. Needles to say, I'm not going back to said small group at unnamed church. Oddly enough, the study last night was on conflicts. Great discussion, but the cursing really turned me off. So -- I sent an email this morning to one of the folks I'm mad at... as a result I am sure he will share the info about being mad at the other one as well as the intimidation factor. But, whatever. I'll deal with it when the time comes.
These verses kept me up most of the night... Not just because of said small group at unnamed church. Also a result of what I've been feeling.
Galatians 5: 16-21 ==> 16So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. 17For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. 18But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law. 19The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Hatred is a strong word, I don't have any hatred towards anyone... but it has been anger. And envy? It's been horrible -- worse than it has been for a while. The only thing I can think of to combat this is Galatians 5:24-25: 24Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other. Another thing that comes to mind is daily Bible study. Starting tonight, regardless of how tired I am after my new weights workout routine.
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