Judgement/personal learning curve

Romans 1:28-Romans 2:1 (NIV)
28Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought not to be done. 29They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, 30slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; 31they are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless. 32Although they know God's righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them. Romans 2:1 You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.

I've heard many sermons on this... mostly only on Romans 2:1 but in context it's much more powerful seeing the few verses before it. Two thoughts occur to me because last night's message I heard on this was much more powerful than ever before... 1) I was probably ready to hear a convicting sermon on judging. 2) It is like Hebrews 4:12 says and the word of God IS living and you never tire of hearing the same thing again and again. :) Amazing, huh?

Look at that list of sins. I'm thinking of all these people who are unsaved who live in these sins daily... even hourly. Romans 2:1 hit me when I read that along with the sermon. That's ME. I have a friend who I have been judging... I haven't really been talking to him because of some stuff he has done. But just twist it a little tiny bit and I'm just as guilty of sin as he is. Ok, so he lied to me (a few times) and he made me look like a liar when I was only using his words to encourage him. But what about me? I have been full of envy lately. Envy because people have close friends and I don't... or, I guess I should say yet, which is a whole different post when I feel led to talk about it. Envy because of those who are married. I have to admit that loneliness/self-pity is pretty bad too... And what about some anger I've been feeling in recent months? That's just as bad as anything listed above. I will be judged just as bad as the drunkard. I will be judged just as bad as the ruthless girls who broke into my email account a "few" years back (which... I have entirely no idea if I would be able to say anything to them if I ever saw them again beyond hello - those scars remain though they have faded with time).

The amazing thing about God is that His grace is renewed every single day (Lamentations 3:22-23). If you just repent, it only takes a second for God's forgiveness to occur and for His love to shine through once again. And that's precisely what I did... in the quietness of my heart, I turned away from the bitter feelings I've been having. And even though I'm operating on 3 hours of sleep today, I'm not quite so lonely. Not just because I know God is with me, loves me and is protecting me... because I'm making moves to not be so lonely. I'm finding my loneliness is stemmed from my starvation of fellowship... with sisters AND brothers in Christ. I could have easily not gone out to Denny's/In-N-Out (no, I didn't have anything but iced tea and then water later)... but I did. And I left with a huge challenge waiting for me on Friday... I was challenged to go up to three people and get their phone numbers. "Hi, I don't know your name, but can I have your number?" But I guess I have to do it and I am sure the challengers will want proof. :)